What’s your worst customer service cock-up? Can you beat Sky’s lack of common sense and communication?

‘Welcome to fluid viewing’ boasts Sky in its advert for its new Sky Q service. Well, it would help if it worked.

I want to tell you about Sky’s double failure to install Sky Q properly in two flats in my block.

It’s a way of shining a light when installation departments and call centres employ robotic process with no room whatsoever for their agents to use common sense. Maybe someone, somewhere will do something about it – but I’m not holding my breath.

Here’s what happened:

• A neighbour and I both ordered Sky Q in early August – we share the same communal dish.

• Sky employs a third-party firm to upgrade the wires to our homes ready for Sky Q and we are told this was done in late August – his installation is set for the August bank holiday weekend, mine for the Saturday just gone.

• But his installation was abruptly called off on the day when the Sky engineer who turned up tells him the upgrade wasn’t actually done for him. It turns out Sky and the third party didn’t talk to each other to determine if it had happened. It’s rescheduled for the Sunday just gone.

• Mine is installed last Saturday but the engineer made an error, meaning only one of my two boxes works. This only became apparent after the engineer left.

• Easily solved, I thought, as another engineer is coming the next day to my neighbour, who can solve this. I even know his phone number as he’d called my neighbour to arrange the installation time, and apparently my fix should be quick so it won’t impact his day too much.

• I ask Sky’s call centre to call him but they refuse, saying it goes against their processes and they’d need to book in another appointment (fast forward six days later to today and despite two calls to them, I’m still waiting for a new time).

• To compound it all, the engineer who comes on Sunday can’t install my neighbour’s system as the upgrade still hadn’t been done for him. Again, it turns out Sky and the third party hadn’t communicated what was going on with the dish and wire upgrade.

I understand following a set process can help to serve as many people as possible, but there must be some room for common sense too.

I know first-hand how call centre staff are supposed to act like robots.

As a student I worked at a Lloyds TSB call centre. I remember a customer I spoke to who had requested a form multiple times which never arrived. We’d key a code into a computer system to set this up and the form would arrive a few days later – supposedly.

But I knew the forms were located close to my desk, so to help this chap out I walked over, put one in an envelope and dumped it in the post out-tray so he’d get it the next day. It all took about a minute.

I thought I’d save him from the computer system going wrong again, and by doing it this way he’d get it within 24 hours. But I got a telling off for using common sense and failing to follow protocol. Sigh.

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